How to convince your wife that you need to build your CrossFit garage gym.

I was thinking today how lucky I am that Mayra supports all my crazy project ideas. No matter the project or cost, she just says ok and we find a way to make it happen. Over the last eight months or so, as I planned my entrance into CrossFit and my gym build, I ran into a lot of guys that were shocked that my wife would let me build a gym. I heard things like “No way my wife would let me do that, or no way I could spend that kind of cash, my wife would be pissed”. Well I figure that either I’m the luckiest guy around or that maybe I have a different way of approaching my wife with ideas. I think it’s a little of both though. Let me share some tips I’ve learned to get your spouse on your side. I’ve compiled a list of the typical problems you might face when confronting your spouse, and a pitch to sell them on the idea.

1. The Problem: You start more projects than Bob Villa does in a season of “This Old House”, but you never finish one.

Your approach: You’re gonna finish this one, you promise: You know who you are, your garage and entire house is filled with more half finished projects than you could complete in a lifetime. Let’s face it, your track record stinks bud, but you can turn that around. It’s gonna take some effort though. So how do you pitch it?

The Pitch: Get your non-working, don’t finish anything ass, up early next weekend and complete a few of your more visible projects. When she asks what you’re doing, say something like “Man I let this place go, I figured I better start finishing some of the projects I started”, then finish them. Give it a couple of weeks until she’s figured you’ve turned a new leaf and then spring the gym idea on her. If you play your cards right you won’t hear a complaint and you’ll be building your gym in no time.

2. The Problem: You have more workout gear than Big Five and the dust on it is an inch thick. You need to buy specific CrossFit gear, but you know she’ll say no.

Your approach: This time your gonna stick with it and in the end you’ll look great: Remember back to when you first started dating your wife? I bet you looked a lot different than you do now? Flash forward a few years and somehow married life has made you comfortable, fat and more than likely slightly repulsive naked. What? My wife doesn’t think my fat ass is sexy? Surprise! But no. Luckily women, for the most part are not as superficial as guys, cause if they were you’d be screwed. I bet if you gave your wife a choice between a lean you and what you’ve become, the lean you would win hands down. So how do you know if you’re a fat overweight slob? Easy next time you take a leak, look down, if you can’t see the family jewels you’re a slob. Not a problem though, because being a slob will work to your advantage. The simple fact that the new gym could make you lose slob status in her eyes should seal the deal. But she’s probably heard your “I’m gonna get in shape” speech before and since you have evidence of your past failures stacked up like cord wood, your line is falling on deaf ears. She’s thinking, why buy new equipment since he never used the stuff we bought last time. To bypass this hurdle your gonna have to pull out all the stops. The easiest way to do this is to set a goal that you can show her. The goal has to be something that without the right equipment, you have no way of accomplishing. So how do you pitch it?


The Pitch: Say something like “Hey honey, I had a look in the mirror last night and I look like a slob. Man ever since we got married I have been slipping. I’d love to get back in shape like when we were dating. I’d really love to build a home gym. I know I’ve bought a lot of gear in the past that I’ve never used but this time I have a goal”. Now before you say another word, open the CrossFit.com website and find some photos of a recent sectional event and say, “I really want to compete in a CrossFit sectional event next year.”  When she sees all the competitors and how they look, you’ll have her support.

3. The Problem: You already have more rooms indoors dedicated to your stuff than she does; now you want more!

Your approach: This gym is gonna benefit the entire family: You can’t just say this gym is for you. She’s got to feel it’s her space to. You have to get her involved and if she doesn’t want to get involved then get the kids on-board, and she’ll love the idea. So how do you pitch it?

The Pitch: Tell her something like “Babe I think we should build a gym we could use together. I was thinking of building it in the backyard”. Then tell her how great it will be, maybe even draw up some plans. Explain how cool its gonna be working out in the rain, maybe the snow etc. Tell her CrossFit is hardcore and they recommend going outdoors when you don’t have the space indoors. When she thinks about how uncomfortable she’ll be, or the kids will be, she’ll cave. In fact, the entire indoor gym idea will be hers and you just like that you’ll have your space. Just make sure to involve her a bit in the build so she feels like it’s a joint venture.

4. The Problem: You’re a busy guy and this gym will be one more thing that will cut into her time with you.

Your approach: The gym will allow for more family time: Play on the fact that you don’t spend enough time together as a family and that the gym would be a great way of spending time together. Start spending time together by going on walks in the evening. Maybe even go shopping to look at workout gear, or even new paint for the gym. Use any tactic to get her involved, remember each minute together is telling her this gym will bring you closer. Also, find a way to tell her subtly that you were thinking of joining a gym, but were worried it would keep you away from her. Simple as that. So how do you pitch it?

The Pitch: Tell her something like “Hey honey, I had a look in the mirror last night and I look like a fat. Man ever since we got married I have been slipping. I’d love to get back in shape like when we were dating. I’m just worried that all the time I spend at the gym would be more time away from you. Maybe we should think about getting a few pieces of workout gear so we could workout together”.

5. The Problem: She hates your friends and the thought of them being over to workout each day repulses her.

Your approach: We’ll have the weekends to enjoy together: Chances are, building your own garage gym and having your buddies over to hit the weights could mean you’ll see them more than ever. But hey I’m telling you how to convince her up front to let you build the thing, not what do when they show up morning, noon and night. So how do you pitch it?

The Pitch: Tell her something like “I know you think that building the gym will mean my friends will be over even more, but that just not true. Since they will be coming over during the week to workout, we won’t be hanging out on the weekends, that can be us time”. Hook line and sinker!

6. The Problem: You are strapped for cash and there is no way she’ll budge with the funds.

Your approach: The house and garage will be clutter free when I’m done: I bet you have enough crap lying around that you could sell and build your gym several times over. What you need to do is capitalize on that fact. Tell your wife that you won’t spend a dime, but instead you plan on selling some junk on EBAY. You’ll be killing two birds with one stone. Chances are she’s wanted you to clean the garage for a while anyway and you never got around to it. Now you can! When she gives in to your idea, check out how I sold stuff on EBAY to pay for my gym.

The Pitch: Hey babe I know we don’t have the money for the CrossFit equipment, but I think I found a way to basically get the stuff for free. Plus the garage will be clean.

I would love to know your ideas on the subject, or if any of these tips worked or failed miserably. Tell me in the comments below.

See you in the hills.

Lance